aweraw wrote:To my perception, this whole discussion revolving around the sexual habits of Rystefn seems to boil down to primal instinct vs societal cohesion. I don't think either side of the argument is clearly the correct way to conduct a society, but we have to recognise that while we value freedom and personal liberty at an individual level, as a society we expect each other to adhere to certain unspoken rules in order to maintain cohesion.
I find that expectation to be asinine. The rules should be spoken. How else are we to suss out which ones are good and which ones are garbage? For example, any rule which purports that a private agreement between two individuals is binding upon any third party, much less the whole rest of society, should rightly be viewed as garbage. If my roommates are vegetarians, am I an asshole for keeping hot dogs in the 'fridge?
aweraw wrote:I think part of the disconnect here might be that Rystefn's view of sex is different from most, because for him, there's no aspect of reproductive investment in the act... and he's not recognising that for most people there is. Would he say that it's a 'hang up' for a person to worry about being cuckold'd, and unwittingly raising the offspring of another man? I'm not sure.
That's an interesting observation. Here's the thing, though: I pose no threat to that reproductive investment. Moreover, no one here (or anywhere else this discussion has risen) has objected on the grounds that that they may wind up raising my child out of the bargain. If that's their motivation, it's well buried under the general anger at the idea that I might take the last cookie (someone else's analogy, not mine). I've seen no one respond with "Well, I've had a vasectomy, so I don't care who she sleeps with, because I won't wind up raising the kid."
aweraw wrote:On the other hand, I can see a lot of you over reacting to his statements, and in doing so end up looking like jealous betas trying to bring down the alpha who is flaunting his (to behonest, self-declared) prowess over you.
I do find it interesting that no matter how many times I say things like "If it comes up" or "If we're attracted to each other" or "If she wants to," people continuously respond as if I'm declaring I'm going to key their car rather than stating that I might perhaps one day have an interaction with another person if a million variables line up just so. If I have sex someone's girlfriend, it not representative of any power or prowess I have. It is only that the two of us took pleasure in each other's company for a while. If someone lacks the power to control their girlfriend enough to prevent her from sleeping with me, it is not because I have the power they lack. It's because she does.
aweraw wrote: He's entitled to say that he has certain proclivities, and I don't think you all should be so personally afronted by them, because I'd wager the chance they'll ever effect you is vanishingly small. Then again, I think there's a certain aspect of agressive disrespect on Rystefn's part when he delares that he would fuck your girlfriend out of malice for you, and that's rather off putting.
In fairness, I only ever said that to one person, and it had more to do with the rhetorical opportunity he handed me than anything else. Frankly, if he's concerned that his girlfriend would actually sleep with me, he should show her that, and it will likely be off the table. If he's still concerned after that, they should just fucking break up, because there's a serious problem in that relationship, and it sure as fuck isn't me.
