Periodic Table of Swearing

[ConcentratedH2O, OM]

Hullo folks - there doesn't seem to be a separate place for introductions here, so I'll be rude and just leap in. http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smilies/pardon.gif

I don't know how much I'll contribute here, as I tend to avoid FtB and its stomach-churning goings-on and focus on being appalled at that feminist Bizarroland, A+. I mainly hang out at Rationalia (infamously the recipient of the wrath of Pizzy Myers and his team of rabid lemmings), and know a few folks here from there, and Facebook. http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smil ... cheers.gif

So.... howdy! http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smilies/tiphat.gif

Howdy yourself and welcome to the pit of slime. I do not usually say welcome to newcomers but your avatar reminds me of a sister-in-law.

Cheers!

PUA.

That made me laugh! Not as hard as when Caine accused me of being one. I have learned to recognize when a woman is tying to pick me up though.

If an aspie like me can get laid without trying too hard, I really do not understand why some "good" guys can not.

Caine is a cunt.

[Bella Fortuna]

I have learned to recognize when a woman is tying to pick me up though.

Rope or chain? :shifty:

[Rystefn]

I've distanced myself from the term recently [not because of the disparate root words.] and began using "relationship anarchist" instead...but only in situations where I have time to actually explain what that means. The way I would define "relationship anarchy" is that I don't set or recognize distinctions between what is a friend and what is an intimate partner. I see it as a sort of spectrum, where the relationship is free to progress however it will. Reciprocation will dictate where the relationship falls on the spectrum. The concept of "polyamory" seems too...relationship-y to me. Like, I don't think of my current primary lover as a girlfriend, even though we've been at it for a while. If she wanted to start calling it a boyfriend/girlfriend type of thing, I wouldn't care just as long as she understands it doesn't change the nature of the relationship. And...with the way she's entered exclusive relationships without putting a stop to our thing, and kept them in the dark about it, I don't think her calling me her "boyfriend" would change much. :?

I'm not 100% okay with that last little factoid, but I've learned to get over it. I've suggested that she come clean about us from the start many times in the past, but that would just mess with her plans. I'm not the "provider" archetype, and I'm not interested in being, so I guess that's the type of thing she seeks from supplementary relationships. I really don't know if I would or wouldn't do the same, in her shoes, so I just shrug. If one day she finds someone that she enjoys being around as much as I, [unlikely 8-) ] and who is also a provider, I fear I might not hear from her again. :lol:

So, when it comes to the summary of your blog post

"I'll fuck your girlfriend anyway, so you may as well learn to be ok with it."

I guess my actions would show that I am in reluctant agreeance.

Hey, if it works for you, have at it. My current girlfriend walked into this relationship knowing that I could up and leave at any moment with or without notice, and she still knows that nothing has changed about that, but she likes to be called that, so I go along with it.

Also, full disclosure: I am 100% fine with people on cheating on other people with me. It does not bother me in the slightest. I refuse to be bound by agreements that other people have made without my input. This policy is well-known among my friends, and would probably be the source of a great deal of drama in my life if I cared in the slightest that it upset them. Those who can't deal with the fact I do not consider it wrong simply don't remain my friends for long.

So yes, that does mean that I do not care how close we are, it will not stop me from sleeping with your girlfriend. Yes, that does also mean that if you want to jump into bed with me, it won't bother me if you're with someone else.

[CommanderTuvok]

I notice on Twatter that some people are making references to people 'joking' about Greta. Does anybody know anything about this?

As for supporting Greta, if you want to, then I suggest you do it anon. The Baboons are like petulent schoolchildren - the schism overides all areas of life, and you won't get any appreciation for any charitiable move if you are deemed to be one of their enemies.

[Rystefn]

I've distanced myself from the term recently [not because of the disparate root words.] and began using "relationship anarchist" instead...but only in situations where I have time to actually explain what that means.

What the fuck are you talking about?!? "Relationship anarchist". For fuck's sake. And when, dear Gretalike, would you be in a situation where you are intimate enough to tell someone you are a "relationship anarchist" but "don't have time" to explain what it is?

"I'd love to meet up again some time. Dinner, Friday, 8 o'clock at Mange a Trois? Cool. Oh, by the way, I'm a...nope, gotta go. Banking. Laundry. Pouring anger into internet."

There's a place for this ludicrous Social Sciences bullshit: here's a link:

http://atheismplus.com/

Spoken like someone who really doesn't get how long a conversation shit like that can be. No fucking way I'd sit down a one-night-stand and spend for or five hours trying to spell out all the fucking details of my personal philosophy on dating and relationships and sex. Fuck that. If there's a one-word answer that's close e-fucking-nough, then it's going to get used, precision be damned.

[welch]

Wooly Bumble Bee - both barrels:

http://freethoughtblogs.com/butterflies ... ent-313966

The money shot is the reply using, i assume, wooly's real name. Nice touch there. This is why I don't bother to comment at FTB at all. Because there's no way you can be right. Wooly asking people to give greta a break for a bit, (right or wrong, I can see where wooly is coming from) proves you're a horrible person because you had to even say that.

Fuck me, really? Someone who normally cannot stand Greta is, misguided or not, trying to do a nice thing, and because you don't like her, you're going to shit all over it.

JUST HOW FUCKING STUPID DO YOU HAVE TO BE TO SLAP AWAY A HAND TRYING TO HELP?

Wait, I already know: FTB stupid.

Ahahahaaha! I love this comment:

malefue says:
October 18, 2012 at 4:02 pm

Wooly_Bumblebee, you must be a horrible person.
The fact that people like you are running around out there frightens me.

It seems to me that most of the FfTB and A+ crowd are frightened of quite a lot of things. Must be a bitch to just get up out of bed some days.

I bet a recalcitrant moth is enough to send them into therapy

[JackRayner]

I've distanced myself from the term recently [not because of the disparate root words.] and began using "relationship anarchist" instead...but only in situations where I have time to actually explain what that means.

What the fuck are you talking about?!? "Relationship anarchist". For fuck's sake. And when, dear Gretalike, would you be in a situation where you are intimate enough to tell someone you are a "relationship anarchist" but "don't have time" to explain what it is?

"I'd love to meet up again some time. Dinner, Friday, 8 o'clock at Mange a Trois? Cool. Oh, by the way, I'm a...nope, gotta go. Banking. Laundry. Pouring anger into internet."

There's a place for this ludicrous Social Sciences bullshit: here's a link:

http://atheismplus.com/

:lol:

I don't need intimacy to tell someone I don't do monogamy. In fact, it's right there in the summary section of the dating website I'm on.

Here's the thing; the concept of "relationship anarchy" [What's your issue with this, by the way? is it the nomenclature? The specific combination of words? The arrangement of letters?! It's a thing, I didn't pull it out of my ass.] is a bit more complex than that of "polyamory". If saying "I'm polyamorous" will get everyone nodding in understanding, then I'm going to stick with it to avoid explaining RA while, for example, I'm engaged in a conversation about non-monogamy while in class, 3 minutes before our 10 minute break is over. Both "relationship" and "anarchy" are loaded terms, and it takes more than a moment to unload what their combination attempts to put a name to.

There's nothing social sciency about it. Cool your tits. :hand:

[CommanderTuvok]

Thanks Justin for the link to that podcast.

I'll have a gander at that a bit later. Dan Barker is always good value.

[StueNever]

Hullo folks - there doesn't seem to be a separate place for introductions here, so I'll be rude and just leap in. http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smilies/pardon.gif

I don't know how much I'll contribute here, as I tend to avoid FtB and its stomach-churning goings-on and focus on being appalled at that feminist Bizarroland, A+. I mainly hang out at Rationalia (infamously the recipient of the wrath of Pizzy Myers and his team of rabid lemmings), and know a few folks here from there, and Facebook. http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smil ... cheers.gif

So.... howdy! http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smilies/tiphat.gif

Smileys are discouraged here. That's your first formal warning.

Aside from that, welcome to the Pit..err..Pyt!

[rayshul]

Benson is pretty much gross right now.

ps. I'm pretty horrified that people in USA have to resort to online begging to cover their health-care. I've "known" that it's not good in USA, but seeing people begging for money for their cancer treatment makes you realize it on another plane (yes, even if it's Greta who's doing the begging). I'm just having trouble comprehending it, in my world, that's simply not something that should ever happen in a modern, civilized country.

I am so horrified by it. I know people who are living with crippling illnesses without treatment because they can't afford it. :/

PS Bella I love smileys. :D

[Bella Fortuna]

Oh good. :dance:

And to those who don't I say resoundingly http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smil ... tongue.gif

[Lsuoma]

Oh good. :dance:

And to those who don't I say resoundingly http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smil ... tongue.gif

Try this one:


:eabod:

[rayshul]

I notice on Twatter that some people are making references to people 'joking' about Greta. Does anybody know anything about this?

As for supporting Greta, if you want to, then I suggest you do it anon. The Baboons are like petulent schoolchildren - the schism overides all areas of life, and you won't get any appreciation for any charitiable move if you are deemed to be one of their enemies.

I've noticed a few comments that are like, well I'm hurt too, can people give me money for that? Nothing else. No one joking about Greta only perhaps questioning her solicitations for money online. Could be wrong though.

[ConcentratedH2O, OM]

:lol:

I don't need intimacy to tell someone I don't do monogamy. In fact, it's right there in the summary section of the dating website I'm on.

Here's the thing; the concept of "relationship anarchy" [What's your issue with this, by the way? is it the nomenclature? The specific combination of words? The arrangement of letters?! It's a thing, I didn't pull it out of my ass.] is a bit more complex than that of "polyamory". If saying "I'm polyamorous" will get everyone nodding in understanding, then I'm going to stick with it to avoid explaining RA while, for example, I'm engaged in a conversation about non-monogamy while in class, 3 minutes before our 10 minute break is over. Both "relationship" and "anarchy" are loaded terms, and it takes more than a moment to unload what their combination attempts to put a name to.

There's nothing social sciency about it. Cool your tits. :hand:

It's the "anarchy" thing. I hate the word to begin with, but to say one is a proponent of "something anarchy" gets my teeth screaming worse than the sound of a thousand dental drills being pulled down a thousand blackboards by a thousand Yoko Onos.

"Relationship anarchy". It just makes me see an 18-year-old boy running through the streets, kissing girls on the cheeks and shouting "Yeah! Relationship anarchy! It's going crazy! Fuck you, mum and dad, with your socially-constructions of "love", "stability" and "monthly direct debits to their son's student bank account!".

PS: my tits = cool. n=2, p<0.05

[KiwiInOz]

:lol:

I don't need intimacy to tell someone I don't do monogamy. In fact, it's right there in the summary section of the dating website I'm on.

Here's the thing; the concept of "relationship anarchy" [What's your issue with this, by the way? is it the nomenclature? The specific combination of words? The arrangement of letters?! It's a thing, I didn't pull it out of my ass.] is a bit more complex than that of "polyamory". If saying "I'm polyamorous" will get everyone nodding in understanding, then I'm going to stick with it to avoid explaining RA while, for example, I'm engaged in a conversation about non-monogamy while in class, 3 minutes before our 10 minute break is over. Both "relationship" and "anarchy" are loaded terms, and it takes more than a moment to unload what their combination attempts to put a name to.

There's nothing social sciency about it. Cool your tits. :hand:

[youtube]0TZ_9-rbslo[/youtube]

It's the "anarchy" thing. I hate the word to begin with, but to say one is a proponent of "something anarchy" gets my teeth screaming worse than the sound of a thousand dental drills being pulled down a thousand blackboards by a thousand Yoko Onos.

"Relationship anarchy". It just makes me see an 18-year-old boy running through the streets, kissing girls on the cheeks and shouting "Yeah! Relationship anarchy! It's going crazy! Fuck you, mum and dad, with your socially-constructions of "love", "stability" and "monthly direct debits to their son's student bank account!".

PS: my tits = cool. n=2, p<0.05

[AndrewV69]

I have learned to recognize when a woman is tying to pick me up though.

Rope or chain? :shifty:

Haha. No thanks, that was a typo.

[Badger3k]

Hullo folks - there doesn't seem to be a separate place for introductions here, so I'll be rude and just leap in. http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smilies/pardon.gif

I don't know how much I'll contribute here, as I tend to avoid FtB and its stomach-churning goings-on and focus on being appalled at that feminist Bizarroland, A+. I mainly hang out at Rationalia (infamously the recipient of the wrath of Pizzy Myers and his team of rabid lemmings), and know a few folks here from there, and Facebook. http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smil ... cheers.gif

So.... howdy! http://rationalia.com/forum/images/smilies/tiphat.gif

Decided to jump into the Pit, eh - welcome to the Wild West. It's often just enough to read and be amazed at the continual antics of the loons, even if there is some crossover between the two fora (or forums, both seem acceptable). Watching the baboons makes me realize how sane everything else in my life is. Even reading my students work.

[JackRayner]

Here's the thing; the concept of "relationship anarchy" [What's your issue with this, by the way? is it the nomenclature? The specific combination of words? The arrangement of letters?! It's a thing, I didn't pull it out of my ass.] is a bit more complex than that of "polyamory". If saying "I'm polyamorous" will get everyone nodding in understanding, then I'm going to stick with it to avoid explaining RA while, for example, I'm engaged in a conversation about non-monogamy while in class, 3 minutes before our 10 minute break is over. Both "relationship" and "anarchy" are loaded terms, and it takes more than a moment to unload what their combination attempts to put a name to.

There's nothing social sciency about it. Cool your tits. :hand:

It's the "anarchy" thing. I hate the word to begin with, but to say one is a proponent of "something anarchy" gets my teeth screaming worse than the sound of a thousand dental drills being pulled down a thousand blackboards by a thousand Yoko Onos.

"Relationship anarchy". It just makes me see an 18-year-old boy running through the streets, kissing girls on the cheeks and shouting "Yeah! Relationship anarchy! It's going crazy! Fuck you, mum and dad, with your socially-constructions of "love", "stability" and "monthly direct debits to their son's student bank account!".

PS: my tits = cool. n=2, p<0.05

As stated before, I think anarchy is a loaded term, so I can understand where you're coming from. You would have hated sitting through the mandatory "International Relations Theory" course that I took, though. The term comes up often. Or, maybe, you would have become conditioned to hearing it used in a less "Rage against The Man, maaaannnnn!" kind of way and become desensitized to it.....

[AndrewV69]

Also, full disclosure: I am 100% fine with people on cheating on other people with me. It does not bother me in the slightest. I refuse to be bound by agreements that other people have made without my input. This policy is well-known among my friends, and would probably be the source of a great deal of drama in my life if I cared in the slightest that it upset them. Those who can't deal with the fact I do not consider it wrong simply don't remain my friends for long.

So yes, that does mean that I do not care how close we are, it will not stop me from sleeping with your girlfriend. Yes, that does also mean that if you want to jump into bed with me, it won't bother me if you're with someone else.

Well, it does me.

There is someone who I avoid because I find his partner very attractive. Even if I knew he was like you and 100% fine with it, I would not be, and I would rather keep myself away from the temptation to make a pass at her.

Third time in my life so far I have come across a woman who gives me a raging hard on just by proximity. Bit of a puzzle really. I am almost ready to believe in pheromones because none of them were similar in the slightest.

[Badger3k]

I don't think it's doxxing any more than calling PZ Myers by his real name, Wooly has posted her real name all over her blog.

It is however an asshole thing to do, and one of the creepy fucking things that crowd does to act as if they have power over someone. We know your name, Rumpelstiltskin...

Ok, didn't know that. Since OB justified it with linking to a comment on some blog, I thought that was the only occurrence, and a quite obscure one at that, but if Wooly is using her real name all over then ok, it's not in any way doc dropping.

ps. I'm pretty horrified that people in USA have to resort to online begging to cover their health-care. I've "known" that it's not good in USA, but seeing people begging for money for their cancer treatment makes you realize it on another plane (yes, even if it's Greta who's doing the begging). I'm just having trouble comprehending it, in my world, that's simply not something that should ever happen in a modern, civilized country.
Not that I will donate, for various reasons, but I do wish her well, having seen friends and relatives both die and live with cancer, it's not something I'd wish on anyone.

What's a bit sadder is that someone like Robert M Price, who does the Bible Geek podcast and writes (and edits) books, apparently has to beg his listeners for donations since he doesn't have a steady job. I say apparently, since I don't know what his finances are like, but he always thanks the people who make donations (at least from the ones I have heard - I'm about a year behind on the podcast). Others try to make a living off the internet and rely on donations, but since he can't seem to get a steady job in his field (biblical studies/teaching) it seems different to me. Of course, I have a friend who can't work and gets some disability, but his wife was fired and still can't find a job after several months. Luckily he has VA, but the whole economic situation here is fucked. My district is switching health care providers so unless I want to spend a few hundred extra a month for (IIRC) a $4k deductible, I have to take the $8k. I'm still paying off medical bills from a few years ago and every visit I have to go to adds back what I pay off.

[Rystefn]

Also, full disclosure: I am 100% fine with people on cheating on other people with me. It does not bother me in the slightest. I refuse to be bound by agreements that other people have made without my input. This policy is well-known among my friends, and would probably be the source of a great deal of drama in my life if I cared in the slightest that it upset them. Those who can't deal with the fact I do not consider it wrong simply don't remain my friends for long.

So yes, that does mean that I do not care how close we are, it will not stop me from sleeping with your girlfriend. Yes, that does also mean that if you want to jump into bed with me, it won't bother me if you're with someone else.

Well, it does me.

There is someone who I avoid because I find his partner very attractive. Even if I knew he was like you and 100% fine with it, I would not be, and I would rather keep myself away from the temptation to make a pass at her.

Third time in my life so far I have come across a woman who gives me a raging hard on just by proximity. Bit of a puzzle really. I am almost ready to believe in pheromones because none of them were similar in the slightest.

I don't envy you. .. That can't be an easy way to live.

[Badger3k]

I notice on Twatter that some people are making references to people 'joking' about Greta. Does anybody know anything about this?

As for supporting Greta, if you want to, then I suggest you do it anon. The Baboons are like petulent schoolchildren - the schism overides all areas of life, and you won't get any appreciation for any charitiable move if you are deemed to be one of their enemies.

I've noticed a few comments that are like, well I'm hurt too, can people give me money for that? Nothing else. No one joking about Greta only perhaps questioning her solicitations for money online. Could be wrong though.

I just added about $400 for my 3x yearly botox shot for idiopathic facial twitches, and another $600 for an endoscope that ended up showing nothing but what could be seen with the naked eye. Should I beg the baboons or just put up and add it to the $1600 I currently owe? Does that qualify as joking - since it's more of mocking. If the writing gig isn't paying, then get a fucking job that will pay regularly. Whoops - that is giving unwanted advice and that is Verbotten with that crowd, isn't it, especially since I have a scrotum?

[Badger3k]

Sorry for the ranting - it's progress report time and most of my kids are failing, and I have to have a heart-to-heart talk and lay down some laws, or let them fail. Not making me happy with them, myself, or my job right now. Makes me cranky.

[TheMan]

From an outsider looking in and clicking on most links provided directing to the FfTB I'm reminded of an expression used amongst aircraft pilots that fits where I am heading with my opinion of the people running the FfTB...

Chasing the dial...

Chasing the dial is when to regain control of the plane, the pilot is looking at the Dials instead of out the window. When chasing the dial you overcompensate banking to the right with a wild pull of the joystick to the left and then wildly back to the right because you banked left too much...

I am not a pilot... and don't know any. Though I did meet a guy in Bali who applies external decorations on commercial jets. I hated him because he works 6 months of the year and is on holiday for the rest.

[AndrewV69]

I don't envy you. .. That can't be an easy way to live.

*shrug*

It is what it is.

As far as I am concerned, it is my issue and I have found that is the easiest way for me to deal with it. The alternative I suppose, is to have all three of those women condemmed as witches, or recognize it for what it is, my problem and not blame it on someone/something else.

[Rystefn]

I don't envy you. .. That can't be an easy way to live.

*shrug*

It is what it is.

As far as I am concerned, it is my issue and I have found that is the easiest way for me to deal with it. The alternative I suppose, is to have all three of those women condemmed as witches, or recognize it for what it is, my problem and not blame it on someone/something else.

I prefer my alternative, which is to have all three of the women in question, if they'll have me. Still, it's your conscience, it's up to you to deal with it ultimately. Not all of us were lucky enough to be born without one.

[TheMan]

I don't envy you. .. That can't be an easy way to live.

*shrug*

It is what it is.

As far as I am concerned, it is my issue and I have found that is the easiest way for me to deal with it. The alternative I suppose, is to have all three of those women condemmed as witches, or recognize it for what it is, my problem and not blame it on someone/something else.

Not even a bit of flirting and/or suggestive dance moves after a couple of glasses of grog?

[rayshul]

On an assiiiiiiddddeee...

I just had the open relationship discussion with my husband, prompted by the Slymepit.

He says, I won't cheat on you because I love you.

I'm like, well what if I said it was okay.

He says, Well I don't know it would be a lot of effort.

So yes it looks like we just can't be arsed. I don't know I think having sex with a lot of people or having lots of relationships would take up so much time. And you'd have to go out all the time to see them and that kind of shit. I mean they could come to your house but then you'd have to find a way to get them politely out of your house when you couldn't be arsed. I guess I'd be okay with a holiday romance thing because my husband doesn't like travelling and I do. But then again I don't really know how convenient that would be. I mean yes there'd be someone to wash my clothes and shit but ughhhh the conversations we'd have to make.

[TheMan]

On an assiiiiiiddddeee...

I just had the open relationship discussion with my husband, prompted by the Slymepit.

He says, I won't cheat on you because I love you.

I'm like, well what if I said it was okay.

He says, Well I don't know it would be a lot of effort.

So yes it looks like we just can't be arsed. I don't know I think having sex with a lot of people or having lots of relationships would take up so much time. And you'd have to go out all the time to see them and that kind of shit. I mean they could come to your house but then you'd have to find a way to get them politely out of your house when you couldn't be arsed. I guess I'd be okay with a holiday romance thing because my husband doesn't like travelling and I do. But then again I don't really know how convenient that would be. I mean yes there'd be someone to wash my clothes and shit but ughhhh the conversations we'd have to make.

hehehe... I was thinking along the lines of

at 30 it's a must
at 50 I just couldn't be arsed

[ConcentratedH2O, OM]

Breaking news from The Chymepit:

I hate cancer.

That is all we have, being the entirety of a comment someone felt compelled to make in their support of Greta Christina. We are working all of our resources in trying to decipher this profound message, so stay tuned.

http://freethoughtblogs.com/pharyngula/ ... ent-475159

[rayshul]

hehehe... I was thinking along the lines of

at 30 it's a must
at 50 I just couldn't be arsed

He's in his mid-20s. -.-

[KiwiInOz]

hehehe... I was thinking along the lines of

at 30 it's a must
at 50 I just couldn't be arsed

He's in his mid-20s. -.-

A teeny bopper then.

[TheMan]

hehehe... I was thinking along the lines of

at 30 it's a must
at 50 I just couldn't be arsed

He's in his mid-20s. -.-

I was referring to myself.... but if he's in his 20's he'll probably have a re think at around 32. :)

[TheMan]

hehehe... I was thinking along the lines of

at 30 it's a must
at 50 I just couldn't be arsed

He's in his mid-20s. -.-

I was referring to myself.... but if he's in his 20's he'll probably have a re think at around 32. :)

and I can't be arsed flirting & chasing & socialising etc etc

[JackRayner]

I need to start hanging out on Twitter again. [Have abandoned the place lately...] I'm missing out on stuff like the following... :popcorn:

http://freethoughtblogs.com/butterflies ... ent-313966

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x17/ ... BonBnW.png

By the by, since it's related, I guess I'll share my thoughts about the whole Greta's-diagnosis-thing: It's unfortunate.

The asking for money: Eh.

[rayshul]

hehehe... I was thinking along the lines of

at 30 it's a must
at 50 I just couldn't be arsed

He's in his mid-20s. -.-

I was referring to myself.... but if he's in his 20's he'll probably have a re think at around 32. :)

Hahahah I've made him put that in his calendar and we'll have that conversation again on his 32nd birthday.

[rayshul]

Btw Lsuoma I did one of those Amazon link referrally purchases a couple of days ago... wondering if that worked?

[AndrewV69]

I don't envy you. .. That can't be an easy way to live.

*shrug*

It is what it is.

As far as I am concerned, it is my issue and I have found that is the easiest way for me to deal with it. The alternative I suppose, is to have all three of those women condemmed as witches, or recognize it for what it is, my problem and not blame it on someone/something else.

I prefer my alternative, which is to have all three of the women in question, if they'll have me. Still, it's your conscience, it's up to you to deal with it ultimately. Not all of us were lucky enough to be born without one.

It could get you killed one day. Just saying.

[Skep tickle]

JackRayner just said it more succintly than I (unfortunate about the cancer, meh about the asking for money) but here goes anyway:

Regarding Greta Christina''s recent diagnosis of endometrial cancer: I'm sorry to hear that. I also recognize that it's more shocking than other medical conditions because of the "C" word and because it's a new diagnosis, yet it IS very likely that surgery will be fully curative, and she'll be able to return to work (probably even before the time frame she relates in her post).

Regarding her request for donations: IMO it's quite crass, and comes across as hypocritical given all this recent attention on how some wonderful forward-thinking atheists are pro-social-justice, as opposed to all us mean angry backward-thinking atheists who are assumed to be opposed to social justice work. The only causes for which I've seen the atheism+ forum folks (a group I associate with her, fairly or not) suggest collecting or directing donations are (a) Kiva microloans and (b) scholarships to send women to conferences (see "The Big Atheism+ Thing" at atheismplus.com, now accessible only to registered members, which leaves me right out since I was banned for trolling). I haven't seen any hint of recognition of the widely reported potential limitations & drawbacks of microfinance, and (more to the point) I haven't seen them put any emphasis on directly helping people who are in dire need and not capable of "helping themselves" (as in microfinance, which is also convenient because one donation keeps giving and giving).

There are many people much worse off than Greta - people who are struggling with chronic benign or malignant conditions or even "just" dire poverty, who don't have any hope of anyone offering to send money to their Paypal account. There are people literally dying for lack of one resource or another that Greta and those sending her money (and we) take for granted, including food, shelter, and the most basic of health care; the homeless man Jen was so disgusted by may be one of them, and there are billions of people around the world living in poverty that is unimaginable to most Westerners. Even without "sinking" to that degree of dire need, 'cuz it's uncomfortable to think about and any effort may seem like a drop in the bucket, I would have been much more impressed if she had suggested people donate to any number of causes that could help people who are truly without resources and in need, say for example to their local hospice program or shelter. Or, keeping with the theme, perhaps a local cancer detection program (like Planned Parenthood - there's no screening program for endometrial cancer, but they do screening for cervical and breast cancer).

Besides which, Greta Christina does some personal connections, people IRL who may be able to help her. She's married; I'm not sure what her wife does (a few minutes with Mr. Google brings up someone of the same name in the same city who is a Vice-President for a division of a telecommunications company, but who may in fact be a different Ingrid) - but the point is that Greta is presumably part of a team-of-2 in a community property state.

Besides which, asking privately of a few people like the back alley of FtB or people she's met on the tour circuit whether they could spot her through a tough financial stretch would IMO seem so much more appropriate than stretching her hand out to strangers, whether she knows their screen names from her blog or not.

Part of where I'm coming from is this: I donate a chunk out of every paycheck to a couple of international charities that seem to do a good job bringing help directly to people in really dire need - Partners In Health, Doctors Without Borders, Mercy Corps, Water First International, and Oxfam International, plus a couple of local charities. And, as part of my job, I review applications from people with no insurance who are seeking free care in the health care facility in which I work; I read through their medical histories and have to decide (with a small group of coworkers) for whom, among these many desperate people, we can significantly improve their health long-term (as that's the main criterion on which the funds are to be used). That often means we offer free care to people for whom surgery or evaluation for possible treatable cancer or some other discrete intervention could cure a problem before it gets out of hand - like Greta's endometrial cancer - but we have to deny free care to people with chronic or incurable problems. We give them tips on where else they might try, but times have been tough and most of the low-cost or free health care resources are swamped or tapped out.

That's where I'm coming from, and why I'm not sending $$ to Greta - though I do wish her a speedy recovery and, most importantly, a curative surgery.

[rayshul]

I notice in the responses to Wooly's video that some people are giving to an American Cancer charity. I think that's a fair idea ... or giving to an organisation like yours, Skep tickle, or Planned Parenthood. Show your support for her awareness raising even if you can't bring yourself to support her personally.

[TheMan]

On an assiiiiiiddddeee...

I just had the open relationship discussion with my husband, prompted by the Slymepit.

He says, I won't cheat on you because I love you.

I'm like, well what if I said it was okay.

He says, Well I don't know it would be a lot of effort.

at the bold point if my partner asked me that I would sigh and ask what his name was hehehe...

[Rystefn]

I don't envy you. .. That can't be an easy way to live.

*shrug*

It is what it is.

As far as I am concerned, it is my issue and I have found that is the easiest way for me to deal with it. The alternative I suppose, is to have all three of those women condemmed as witches, or recognize it for what it is, my problem and not blame it on someone/something else.

I prefer my alternative, which is to have all three of the women in question, if they'll have me. Still, it's your conscience, it's up to you to deal with it ultimately. Not all of us were lucky enough to be born without one.

It could get you killed one day. Just saying.

True enough, but I'm not the type to live my life looking over my shoulder and acting as if everyone I meet is going to maul me. Given the choice between living well and living long, I'll choose well every time, and you can carve "It was worth it!" on my tombstone.

[disumbrationist]

I just had the open relationship discussion with my husband, prompted by the Slymepit.

He says, I won't cheat on you because I love you.

I'm like, well what if I said it was okay.

He says, Well I don't know it would be a lot of effort.

That's an interesting reaction.
It's like you asked him to remodel the guest room so your parents could come live with you.

I wonder to what degree the culture of monogamy is supported purely by laziness. Think about it: it's the easiest way to get some action without having to put too much thought into it.

[Steersman]

....
I prefer my alternative, which is to have all three of the women in question, if they'll have me. Still, it's your conscience, it's up to you to deal with it ultimately. Not all of us were lucky enough to be born without one.

It could get you killed one day. Just saying.

“Bad, bad LeRoy Brown” …

[AndrewV69]

True enough, but I'm not the type to live my life looking over my shoulder and acting as if everyone I meet is going to maul me. Given the choice between living well and living long, I'll choose well every time, and you can carve "It was worth it!" on my tombstone.

Once you have children (if you ever do) you may find that outlook changing. I am not saying it will, just that I have seen it happen.

[AndrewV69]

....
I prefer my alternative, which is to have all three of the women in question, if they'll have me. Still, it's your conscience, it's up to you to deal with it ultimately. Not all of us were lucky enough to be born without one.

It could get you killed one day. Just saying.

“Bad, bad LeRoy Brown” …

I have seen it happen actually. I spent nearly twenty years in a couple of 3rd world countries.

[Rystefn]

True enough, but I'm not the type to live my life looking over my shoulder and acting as if everyone I meet is going to maul me. Given the choice between living well and living long, I'll choose well every time, and you can carve "It was worth it!" on my tombstone.

Once you have children (if you ever do) you may find that outlook changing. I am not saying it will, just that I have seen it happen.

Never going to happen. I've a few heritable issues that it would be cruel to inflict on a child, so I've taken steps to ensure that i will not. I may be a complete and utter bastard, but even I have my limits.

[Steersman]

I need to start hanging out on Twitter again. [Have abandoned the place lately...] I'm missing out on stuff like the following... :popcorn:

http://freethoughtblogs.com/butterflies ... ent-313966

I’m reminded of a friend – Catholic woman – of a friend who commented that people are now talking about details of their lives on public television and on the Internet that 40 or 50 years ago they wouldn’t have told their priests in confession. Maybe the results or the consequences are generally better – confession supposedly being good for one’s soul even if not always for those of one’s interlocutors – but I figure the blessings are decidedly mixed and not always entirely edifying.

For instance, while WB generally makes some credible arguments, although there seems periodically to be an edge of maliciousness to them, the following quote of her husband’s – according to Ophelia – lends support to the argument that all of us have clay feet – glass houses and all that ….

October 18, 2012 at 6:15 pm
Well, “JS”, that’s pretty easy for you, isn’t it, since no one will have a clue who you are.

It’s not true about Kristina Hansen though. Her husband – Joel Mendez – posted two tweets on #atheismplus saying “is she dead yet?” Meaning Greta. No, those two are not good people.

[rayshul]

Here's a thing.

Are those posts from Ikonografer before or after OB laid into his wife?

I note that WB donated to Greta and I would assume she'd have talked to her husband before making that donation (and making the video urging others to do the same). Aside from little donations under $50 or so, I would talk to my husband before donating $$ or giving it to someone.

I see discrepancy there between giving a woman money to help her health and then making flippant comments about whether she was dead yet. It's one of those situations where this doesn't make any sense to me logically and I'd like clarification.

[Lurker]

Can the sex life discussion be taken to a separate thread? It's starting to come across as competing bragerts, especially to someone like me who is, shall we say, relationship challenged.

[rayshul]

Agreed, but I would totally continue this convo if someone sticks up a thread...

Would also be interested in a charity-thread... I like knowing what stuff other people do as it gives me ideas of good places to donate.

[JackRayner]

Also, full disclosure: I am 100% fine with people on cheating on other people with me. It does not bother me in the slightest. I refuse to be bound by agreements that other people have made without my input. This policy is well-known among my friends, and would probably be the source of a great deal of drama in my life if I cared in the slightest that it upset them. Those who can't deal with the fact I do not consider it wrong simply don't remain my friends for long.

So yes, that does mean that I do not care how close we are, it will not stop me from sleeping with your girlfriend. Yes, that does also mean that if you want to jump into bed with me, it won't bother me if you're with someone else.

Like I mentioned, I'm learning to get over it. To specify though, my bother has more to do with the breaking of promises. I think that the concept of your word having some weight is important. Communication becomes useless when there isn't or cannot be any trust. If a person willingly enters into an agreement, and in the case of a relationship, for something that will benefit them, I think they should do their best to keep to it, and come clean and dissolve the agreement should they fail to keep their end of the bargain. I dunno, blame my upbringing and/or Marine indoctrination for my sense of "honor"... [Might even call it self-righteous, from what's about to follow...]

The "but" though, is that I don't see this is as a promise that the average person can keep, should attraction and opportunity be present in just the right mix. My wish to retain a small glimmer of optimism keeps me thinking that this comes from a lack of self-knowing, and not from intentional deception. I think the average person simply buys into the fairy tales they're fed [why should that be a surprise, the majority of humanity is theistic]and go through life following the path they've been pointed towards without ever stopping to question any of it. Nonsense like "soul mates", "the one", or even the silly belief that when you're in love with someone it creates a kill-switch that shuts off our emotional and/or sexual attraction to others. As I mentioned in your blog, it's a conflation of "I agree not to fuck anyone else" and "I'm not interested in fucking anyone else". When people react with anger to my mentioning this, it kind of tells me they're just a bit clueless and naive.

I've reached a similar conclusion to yours on the topic of someone else cheating on their partner with me. I didn't [usually...?] agree to not fuck anyone, and I reject the idea of people as property. I also recognize agency and personal accountability. Any action they take towards becoming intimate with me is their own, and they're just as capable of putting the breaks on it as anyone else that has before. And also, if I turn them down, it's not like it will stop them from seeking someone else to break their promise with, so why be an ungrateful bastard?

As for Andrew's mention of this possibly getting one killed...yea. Probably as likely as jumping in one's car and going for a drive. Discretion [and defensive driving] should help me stay a live for a little longer though. I'll note though [and I believe this is probably the case for Rystefn as well], that I don't specifically go after partnered women. I know men that do, though, but I don't think it's that impressive of a feat.

[Philip of Tealand]

Ophelia, in a recent post "It's all trolling, when you come right down to it" continues this redefinition campaign of 'stalking.'

http://freethoughtblogs.com/butterflies ... own-to-it/

The pro-misogyny (yes, misogyny) crowd is passing around an article on “liberal bullying.” Of course they are. The people who stalk a few bloggers day in and day out for a year and a half are “brave heroes” and freedom fighters; the people they stalk relentlessly are liberal bullies.

Gee...I suppose Stephanie Zvan, then, is one of my biggest stalkers?

Why the fuck does she need to drag "misogyny" into *everything*? I have to squash the urge to smack so many people with a fucking dictionary, I swear.

Don't you know misogyny is EVERYWHERE! It is there lurking in the shadows, ready to pounce - Ophelia can see it why can't you?

Perhaps she has super powers.

Or she is paranoid.

[Skep tickle]

Or paranoia is her super power.

[JackRayner]

Can the sex life discussion be taken to a separate thread? It's starting to come across as competing bragerts, especially to someone like me who is, shall we say, relationship challenged.

I can see that, and it's something I'm empathic to, because of friends, and reasons. It's a subject of high interest for me though. Hanging out with friends usually begins or ends with conversations on the topic. Human relationship dynamics are my favorite subject. I'd be Ok with a separate thread. Or, y'know, some skilled conversationalist could take part of what is written in any of the relationship/sex posts and use it to guide the conversation away with a well crafted reply. Which, I don't know why you'd do but, hey. Just sayin'. :mrgreen:

[JackRayner]

By the way, Skep tickle, this

JackRayner just said it more succintly than I (unfortunate about the cancer, meh about the asking for money) but here goes anyway:

followed by a giant wall of text made me spit all over my screen. :D

[Steersman]

….
Are those posts from Ikonografer before or after OB laid into his wife?
….
I see discrepancy there between giving a woman money to help her health and then making flippant comments about whether she was dead yet. It's one of those situations where this doesn't make any sense to me logically and I'd like clarification.

Good questions to which I don’t have the answers and have only the foggiest idea how to find them – presumably the Twitter feeds of the usual suspects (e.g., Google Twitter Woolybumblebee) – and limited interest in doing so. But it seems to me that before or after is largely immaterial as there seems little or no justification for the comments in either case – assuming that Benson is correct as far as the source and context is concerned.

However, to be somewhat fair I remember making a similar comment about which I am not particularly proud, but that was when I was 12 or 13 years old … Lord of the Flies and all that ….

Time to call it a day; night all ...

[Philip of Tealand]

Right

Greta, there are not words to describe how sorry I am you have been diagnosed with cancer, I would not wish it on anyone, I've lost too many people who I loved dearly, it still is attacking people I love. I fucking hate the disease.

Like others here though, I'm still not going to stop disagreeing with you. My opinion of you will not change, you have been positively beastly to a lot of people, including Abbie, whom I hold in considerably higher esteem than I ever will you. You are not a nice person in my humble opinion and no, I'm not going to donate. I give what money I have to cancer charities, I'm not going to do any more than that.

I do, however, hope you get better.

Ophelia

You idiot.

I love the way there is NOTHING, absolutely fucking nothing, anyone who disagrees with you can ever do anything right.

Wooly, whose charitable actions are far beyond anything I'd do, actually put some effort into helping out your friend Greta. She sends out a video, asks for people to be a bit nicer and also spreads the word about donating to Greta's cause.

But noooooo, if an FtB/Skeptchick/Radfem had done what Wooly did, it would all be praise and thanks - Wooly, who positively loathes you lot, actually goes out of her way to be nice and helpful and the "morally repellant" insults start flying, you and your ilk start lying about things to paint Wooly in the worst possible light and you then act all surprised when she bites back!

Shame on you. Seriously.

[rayshul]

I can't tell myself given that my settings on Twitter are set to my time and I'm not going anywhere near B&W anyway. :/

I think finding that out might give some context to his comments/anger at the situation. Which is why I'd be interested. I'd be shitted off to the point of shouting insults if I'd donated to someone and then been called basically a shitfuck by their "friends". I note that WB discussed her own feelings on this in a video coming to the conclusion that Greta just had shitty friends and shouldn't be judged by them.

I'm also a believer in words being less important than actions, which is another reason I can't really be like, well, Ikonografer is talking smack but... they also gave money... and I can imagine that having 4 kids is pretty expensive.

[Pitchguest]

Teal dear:

In case you wanted an update of David Futrelle (the blogger known as manboobz on manboobz.com), he's still an insufferable toadie who can't -- or rather, won't -- take criticism.

In this post, Reddit MRA upvote brigade to the rescue! he's slandering MRA's (again) without evidence upvoting an entry on Urban Dictionary unfavourable to Atheism+ (apparently some thread on Reddit with 46 comments linking to the urbandictionary entry prompted him to make this generalisation). I decided to jump in and try to put some sense into it, first questioning his decision that MRA's were responsible (to which he linked the aforementioned Reddit thread) and then adding some reasons why the Urban Dictionary might have had a point. The reactions were scathing, seething, but not unpredictable.

However in the furore the subject of Amanda Todd came up (another thread on David Futrelle's blog) because I'd made some comments criticising his slander of The Amazing Atheist as 'an all around terrible person' because he posted a picture on Tumblr being rude to Amanda Todd after she commited suicide. (let's be honest, he's an asshole but he's not an all around terrible person). So what I did was I wanted to provide some perspective, as a sort of 'devil's advocate' on why he felt the way he felt. My comments were uncerimoniously deleted and so were anyone else who put forward even the tiniest defense for TJ. Anyway, I made some comments on the other thread (the Reddit/MRA thread) and I had a conversation and while we didn't agree, at least we were discussing it. But when David Futrelle, Manboobz, the mocker of misogyny, woke up from his beauty sleep, he decided that once again, since my posts were putting TJ in a different light that didn't fit in his narrative of 'all around terrible person' and 'misogynist MRA', my posts were once again deleted and I was put straight in moderation. I wish I'd taken screenshots of the exchange, but the little of what is left not concerning Todd can be read in the comment section.

Note also the brief discussion on Jen McCreight which I managed to cram in there (not sure if that was memoryholed along with all the other posts, I haven't checked yet) and how simple it is for them to demonise a homeless person. If nothing else a remarkable piece of character study just what kind of people can be found at these kinds of blogs. They also had the incredible arrogance of assuming I don't know how the blog works and that I should educate myself. Yes, I know, echo chamber, if you don't upset the status quo you don't get your posts deleted or your IP sent to moderation. I know exactly how the blog works.